We WON...... maybe, at least for today

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say some things that I'm very sure there are plenty of people that will take issue with and disagree with. At this point, if that makes me a bad mom or a bad person, then so be it.

Children today are self-centered, irresponsible, lazy, whiners who think that life should be handed to them on a silver platter with gold trim. I may as well elaborate since I've actually made the rude statement.....

First off self centered. Yes, narcissistic little creatures that have very little empathy or understanding of anyone else's role in their existence. They exist, therefore it shall be.... whatever "it" may be in the particular circumstance. I want, therefore I shall have. I think, therefore everyone else shall agree. I've changed my mind, therefore everyone else shall too. My God, they're worse than a woman with PMS that also ran out of her prozac. Trust me, as a woman, I know..... (either that or get me some prozac NOW!) Our creatures have pushed our limits today. Each one wants to play with this particular other one RIGHT NOW, but not this other kid. (we have 4). Then 5 minutes later they switch it up based on the raging, whining or bitching of one of them. So basically it's a constant fight as to who gets to play in this one's room or that one's room or with this toy or that based all on how ONE kid feels at that particular moment.... which brings about.....

Irresponsibility. After a few hours of this, there are toys strewn from floor to ceiling and wall to wall. We have 20 acres, there are toys strewn 10 acres away from "home base" even. Do you think that it's anyone's job to actually pick up these toys and return them to their rightful places so they're available to play with next time? Yes, actually, they do believe it's someone's job..... just not theirs. On another note, our two oldest are actually the worst for feeding time mess. They seem to think that he who eats the fastest gets the most. This should have become obvious over the years. It is what it is. You have a certain amount of meat, a certain amount of vegetables and a certain amount of fruit on your plate. Just because you shit-canned your broccoli under your chair does NOT mean you get some dessert. Alas, they still try this tactic daily.... and when actually asked to pick up said broccoli.. they cringe and act like we've just asked them to execute all the baby kittens in North America.

Lazy? My statement of calling them lazy doesn't even really pertain to the above mentioned scenarios, although I suppose those could be translated that way too if you chose to. Lazy actually comes on a different note, or notes. Take school work.... if we can get it done in 10 minutes and it looks like crap that still beats spending an extra 2 minutes to erase nicely or print nicely and make things look presentable. If we can get by with a one word answer it's well worth saving the effort of writing a complete sentance. Or....actually WALK somewhere? Why, if we can drive or take the ATV's? God forbid we shall exert any physical effort when we can avoid it.
We will walk around our boots and coats in the entryway rather than expend the extra energy to actually hang them up.... GASP! As if that would ever even be considered to be "our" job. After all we currently need to get back in the playroom to destroy what's just be picked up while we were outside.

So we cracked..... actually we probably just did what any normal self-respecting adult should have been doing all along. We didn't beat them, we didn't yell at them, we didn't even point out to them just exactly how we had to walk uphill to school in -40 temps every day of our childhoods. We simply offered them an alternative for their boredom (they must be bored if they have all this time to fight). We wrote down 8 fairly equal jobs and put them in a hat. We made each child draw 2 jobs. They were burning mad at us. They glared at us and fumed and you could tell they were just boiling beneath the surface, but they didn't actually open their mouths to voice it. It took them about 45 minutes to complete these jobs (and we have a relatively neat house now). We haven't seen them since. We assume they are out in the treehouse my husband built for them a couple years ago. That's where they said they were going. We saw one across the field actually scouring the edge of the woods for something about 1/2 hour ago. Every once in awhile we hear an ATV.

In a nutshell, they apparently aren't bored anymore. They've actually gone outside into the woods and found things to imagine and play. They've got the world by the balls compared to so many children.... maybe today they're actually exploring that world.

So... .when's dinner and what are we having?